I found this poster on Tuesday, pinned on the wall of a very dirty community centre kitchen, where I had been sent to make tea.
I like the reminder.
But then I'm always getting reminders and then just forgetting again.
Life moves on and I fall asleep again.
Then yesterday I get another reminder in a less subtle, much more shocking way. I am still reeling from the pain of what has happened to someone I once knew. Someone with whom I spent so many of my days. Someone that I cannot now help or comfort, because I walked away from our friendship. I walked away because at the time I was feeling sorry for myself, depressed, anxious and ashamed. I was only thinking of myself and how unworthy I was. Unable to reach out to others or be of any use to anyone.....or so I thought. I've lost so much in life through my own stupidity, and through my own bitterness. I've lost the chance to share in the good times. I've lost the chance to give support, give myself, give my time, give my love.
So today I will reach out again and I will not worry about my imaginings.
I always say that life is too short to hold back. Then I hold back through irrational fears. I draw myself up. I keep myself safe. So why have I been so unhappy?
Someone like me, who lost a parent early in life, should surely know this lesson well?
Ah now. No more anguish and no more regret.
There is enough sorrow.
We spend too much of our time with fear.
It's time for full on joy. Every moment matters.
"The dark does not destroy the light; it defines it. It's our fear of the dark that casts our joy into the shadows."
Brene Brown
Here are my Index cards for this week starting with today's card. I love these words from the Mary Oliver poem particularly......"In the personal life, there is always grief more than enough, a heart-load for each of us on the dusty road. I suppose there is a reason for this, so I will be patient, acquiescent."
"...a heart-load for each of us."
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| ICAD 65 - 28/8/11 |
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| ICAD 60 - 23/8/11 |
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| ICAD 61 - 24/8/11 |
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| ICAD 62 - 25/8/11 |
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| ICAD 63 - 26/8/11 |
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| ICAD 64 - 27/8/11 |
With the "heart-load" of grief that so many people have to bear, I wonder sometimes how they get up and carry on each day.
As always I am in awe of the courage and strength of human beings.
It matters that I acknowledge this today.
Those cards are lovely. I tried doing a few but never really settled into the challenge. I admire the fact that you have stuck with this. Well done.
ReplyDeleteI love the orange rectangles one specially.
After a month abroad with no tv, radio and limited mobile phone communication I'm now in transition back in the UK.
ReplyDeleteI love your card challenge and the variety of images, especially the lavender one.
Welcome back Linda. Thanks for both of your words about my cards. The lavender one was a very lazy card - the glue is still wet!
ReplyDeleteWhat a great poster, and such true words. And your ICADS are great, I esepcially love the cut out flowers.
ReplyDeleteI don't know if you have read any books by Cheri Huber, but from what I've read of your blog, I think you might like her writing. I know I am finding her helpful right now.
Hi Viv, thank you. I have heard of Cheri Huber and thought I had read some of her books but when I looked her up I don't think I've read any. I must have seen her online somewhere. Thanks for the comment and yes the poster is fabulous isn't it?
ReplyDelete