I went to see this exhibition when I was in London last week. It is currently at The British Library and only a very small collection from the new book by Paul McCartney.
It was good to see the photographs and especially the handwritten lyrics to "Here, There and Everywhere", one of my favourites. Such a simple and beautiful melody and lyrics.
My friend and I also went to another exhibition(for another post) at The British Museum, which we had managed to book to see in one of the extra slots added in the evening, due to the demand.
It was quite eerie walking out through the empty museum afterwards. I do love this space. I often used to visit here when I had time when coming to London, as it is near the train station. I have never been there at night before however.
My friend took these photos as we enjoyed the experience of the Museum at night and I spotted the almost full moon through the glass roof. Stunning!
I feel really blessed in my life to be able to have the freedom and finances sometimes to visit London and enjoy the many free or reasonably priced museums and exhibitions. Being there last week I realised how much I have missed the big city with all of the interesting things to do and see.
There is lots to do here "up North" too, with Manchester and Liverpool only a short train ride away and in the small towns too there is always something happening, and lots to learn about.
This morning, in my "morning chair", I am sitting and reconnecting with myself.
At the edges of my thinking there is a sense of panic. The seconds and minutes of my Sunday are so precious. The seconds and minutes of my life are so precious. In the blink of my eye, it will be Monday morning. In the blink of my eye it will all be over.
My mind is racing about joining this or that and about doing so many things. I guess that is the summer energy calling me.....
I was talking to someone yesterday about my tendency to have a lot of ideas about what I want to do in the world, and how I want to spend my very precious free time. How I often have difficulty bringing my ideas to fruition. This is something I always blame on my work life and that lack of a work life balance. It is also due to my wanting so much, being distracted by all that is possible, my lack of focus on just one thing and a lack of clarity about my desires (thanks Jen Louden).
How do you manage all the distractions and exciting things going on out there? Just this morning alone I have seen three online courses I really really want to sign up for, but I already have a lot of unfinished courses I joined and did not complete. Lots of books waiting to be read. How do I give time to follow my interests when there is already so much demanding my attention? How do I manage myself and avoid the inevitable overwhelm?
Saying Hello to July here might help settle my mind and give me some focus.
Let me spend some time reflecting through some photos and words on how my June went. I am still taking a photo a day and this is a really quick way for me to check in with myself on busy days. Sometimes I add a quote that is a meaningful reminder to me, or occasionally I might write some words of my own. I miss writing my own words.
June started with a bang, on June 1st I spend a long day working in the park. The sun was shining and the events of the day made my heart both ache and overflow with love at the same time. I reflect on how privileged I am to do the work I do, and I am always trying to find ways to do it well and to keep improving. Some days I still doubt myself and wonder if I need to move on and leave this very difficult and often heart breaking work to the younger people. That time is approaching fast. You do need to be so strong, resilient and whole in yourself to do this work.
June 1st 2021 "The greatest good you can do for another is not just share your riches but to reveal to him his own." Benjamin Disraeli
It is great to be out and about for work and in my personal life, seeing signs everywhere that are making my heart fill with joy. How lovely that the libraries are opening again and that human beings, older and younger can socialise again with each other. The pandemic lockdowns have really brought that home to me, just how much we humans need human connection and physical presence.
June 3rd 2021
June 3rd 2021
As I go about my work, I reflect on how to treat myself more kindly, like a small child, like a friend... something I continue to learn and try to do for myself. I am walking out with more confidence these days and more of a sense of being worthwhile. I am becoming more whole, leaning into life, and leaning back onto my long dinosaur tail. Some days I still feel like I am drowning, but the tide is always coming in and going out again, and I continue to learn about my own ebbing and flowing.
5th June 2021
5th June 2021
I'm also learning how to relax and have fun, to enjoy life and to laugh. I'm doing really well in this lesson, but there is always a serious side and meaning made. Watching "Saturday Night Fever" again after all these years, I saw a side to the film that I had not realised the significance of in 1977 when I was a teenager. Watching it now I see how the content regarding gender roles, and gang culture is so very relevant to today's teenagers both for girls and boys trapped in areas of poverty and high crime. Such a sad film with amazing music and dancing, and the ending gives some hope for Tony, the character played by John Travolta... hope that individuals can get out of terrible situations and change the future for others.
5th June 2021
9th June 2021 - Motherland
I'm laughing a lot at the moment and one of the reasons why is the above television comedy programme which can be found on iplayer currently. I love all of the main group of characters, and this is Julia played by Anna Maxwell Martin. Great writing and acting, I'm totally hooked.
12th June 2021
June has been a clearing the garden kind of month, and a "getting to grips with" outstanding garden and house matters. This "getting to grips with" continues in July as there is a lot that needs doing! I am asking for help more which is a great step forward for me, it has always been something I have struggled to do preferring to do things myself (for "do things" read "not do things").
13th June 2021
Cycling, spending time with friends and family, walking, enjoying the sunshine and beautiful skies. Life is full and blooming at the moment, so why am I feeling so much restlessness? Questions I am asking are about what it is I have to learn about friendships and about being in relationship to others; about how to trust myself, keep my word to myself and take care of myself.
14th June 2021
15th June 2021
We met up in the park for a whole team development day. It is over a year since I saw my colleagues face to face. We continue to work from home which I would have always wanted prior to the Pandemic. Strangely this introvert and socially anxious human being does miss being in the office. It is likely we will continue to work from home but have some opportunities for office working too.
20th June 2021
This little guy continues to be loveable and cute.
21st June 2021 - Solstice Moon
24th June 2021- The rain is so welcome.
25th June 2021- She looks how I feel!
25th June 2021 - Another evening bike ride.
28th June 2021 I am needing to manifest my desires and focus, this might help.
Oh my goodness, it's May again already! Where has all that time gone since I last wrote properly here, and what have I been doing since then? Sometimes I feel sad that I have not kept blogging here as it is a great place to keep a record of all the things that catch my attention, important events and my feelings about them; and how in general I am doing on my journey. It's a place to keep in touch with other bloggers and get involved in blogging challenges. I do love it here and miss writing here.
Sometimes I find that lately, particularly since I had my cataract surgery and became single again, I just can't find the energy or time to write much. I seem to be less reflective and more in the moment, living my life and not ruminating on improving myself all of the time. I do miss that part if me who is so reflective. I spent a lot of time with her. Sometimes I feel afraid about how fast time is passing and I am not thinking about it or reflecting or making the most of things. That part of me likes to cling onto things and thoughts and memories, and I recognise the panic and that old feeling of not doing or being enough. She did become rather stuck in the past though, and could be too negative and pessimistic.
These days a photo a day helps me to feel I am marking th e day. Sometimes a meaningful quote, sometimes a written reflection. As always life is busy with my day job still. There is no-one living here with me to help cook or wash the pots and clothes, or to do the garden. So I suppose the time I used to spend reading and writing, and occasionally being creative, is now spent on household chores and clearing my head space! Myself and the cat seem to make an awful lot of mess just by ourselves it seems. No wonder he needs so much rest all of the time. 😂
I won't sign up for any blogging challenges this time. That never seems to work for me. Life is incredibly busy and I do continue to live life with a sense of joy, and awe and wonder. Along with that I do also continue to be quite scattered and unfocused, which I am coming to accept is just part of how I am. Some of the not getting to grips with this part of me, is due to having been feeling quite lacking in hope and energy for some time. I had really struggled when I became single again, and to be fair, before that too with recurrant depression. Also for years I had been battling with social anxiety and recovery from trauma from my childhood. I was always someone who had hope in bagfuls, but this year when a loved one really hit a difficult time, I just couldn't pick myself up again. I am doing well again now thank goodness, here I am again taking one step at a time, one day at a time....focusing on the good things in my life and how I can do small things to contribute to making the world a kinder place.
"'One is always at home in one's past,' wrote author Vladimir Nabokov. I agree. Sometimes that's not a good thing, though. It may lead us to flee from the challenges of the present moment and gp hide and cower and wallow in nostalgia. But on other occasions, the fact that we are always at home in the past might generate brilliant healing strategies. It might rouse in us a wise determination to refresh out spirit in the deep solace of feeling utterly at home..... I invite you to keep a running list of the ways life delights you and helps you and energies you. Describe everyday miracles you take for granted...the uncanny powers you possess...the small joys that occur so routinely you forget how much they mean to you...the steady flow of benefits bestowed on you by people you know and don't know. What works for you? What makes you feel at home in the world?"
Hmmm, what makes me feel at home in the world? For starters... solitude, stillness, the sound of water running or surging, music playing, singing along on a sunny day or whilst cleaning the house, movement.... like riding my bike or driving along(not speeding of course) or walking in nature ... being with people who "get me" and who I equally "get', a good story either written or acted, poetry, words, song lyrics, art...photography... seeing the details or the larger view, birds and their songs, tree friends, sky colours and sunsets, bluebell woods....
Photos and videos from March and April this year, what a lot of goodness there is! What makes you feel at home in the world? I'd love to hear what you love and what loves you. This past year has been so difficult and the world and humanity continue to bleed and suffer. This has always been the case of course, but some of us were protected more than others. We felt the personal suffering, but were more removed from wars, disease, racism and other forms of hate. This past year has reminded me of my privilege and to make the most of every tiny moment. Life is precious and these moments of awe and wonder fill my cup and bring immense feelings of gratitude.
As I missed singalong a Saturday this week, here is the song I would have posted.... it's music Monday!
Sending love and blessings to all of you out there in bogland on this holiday Monday. 🙏
