Barbara Bloom
December 2nd: Eliminate.
My #adventwindows word for today was eliminate. How amazing that this word should show up today after a few days of overindulgence following our good news on Thursday. No I am not ill and confined to the bathroom, don't worry! I am simply over-full of food and drink; very full indeed, in fact bloated and uncomfortable. For a whole month I haven't been drinking alcohol, and have been watching what I eat most carefully.
So, eliminate? It makes me think of a dalek, "ExTerRrrMinAtinG!"
My 49 year old tummy is not able to eat or drink as it once did, it is complaining. So when I awoke this morning with an older, and much less tolerant tummy reminding me that I ate too much last night, I looked around for someone else to blame for our troubles. Mr Stayingawake was an ideal candidate. He did the shopping this week, so I had already moaned at him yesterday about buying too much; and about how we really did not need all that food in the cupboards. Mr Stayingawake has been buying food like we are about to be under house arrest for six months. I don't know what has got into him. It's driving me mad. I have an uneasy relationship with food and my weight; so on Sunday morning when I felt unhappy with my tummy, I turned it round and accused him of not helping me lose weight and stay healthy. Whilst there might be a little truth in this (Mr Stayingawake is not looking after himself very well right now and dislikes it if I try to encourage smaller portions and more exercise); I cannot really blame anyone else for eating or drinking too much except myself!
My bitter and complaining mood continued as I cleaned the cooker. Again Mr S was the object of my dissatisfaction. As he has been at home from work for four months he has been cooking most of the time, on some occasions baking tempting treats, including his favourite bread pudding which I really have no time for. I am not a very sweet tooth whereas he is. He has also been baking Christmas Cakes, at this time of year he enjoys using his Mum's recipe to make cakes as gifts for people. It makes him happy.
I found the pan in the cooker caked in a burned, and very sticky, black substance which did not want to come off. I mumbled to myself about how someone who cooks should be careful to clean sticky messes off the cooker instead of leaving it for the rest of us to do. (For anyone who read my post for Saturday and is thinking how quickly my mood has changed from one of positivity and good intentions - I actually wrote that post after I had been scrubbing for some hours on Sunday and just before this one.)
I had also gotten myself all worked up about Mr S going away at the weekend. Whilst working it all out on my knees in front of the cooker, I reminded myself of how often I swan off on my own, and decided that I was just being silly.
So the hours of scrubbing helped me work a few things out, as did finding the advent windows project. It is just what I need for December. The ebook asks us to reflect during the day with our word in mind, on four questions:
So, eliminate? It makes me think of a dalek, "ExTerRrrMinAtinG!"
My 49 year old tummy is not able to eat or drink as it once did, it is complaining. So when I awoke this morning with an older, and much less tolerant tummy reminding me that I ate too much last night, I looked around for someone else to blame for our troubles. Mr Stayingawake was an ideal candidate. He did the shopping this week, so I had already moaned at him yesterday about buying too much; and about how we really did not need all that food in the cupboards. Mr Stayingawake has been buying food like we are about to be under house arrest for six months. I don't know what has got into him. It's driving me mad. I have an uneasy relationship with food and my weight; so on Sunday morning when I felt unhappy with my tummy, I turned it round and accused him of not helping me lose weight and stay healthy. Whilst there might be a little truth in this (Mr Stayingawake is not looking after himself very well right now and dislikes it if I try to encourage smaller portions and more exercise); I cannot really blame anyone else for eating or drinking too much except myself!
 |
| Mr S is all ready to decorate his cakes. |
I found the pan in the cooker caked in a burned, and very sticky, black substance which did not want to come off. I mumbled to myself about how someone who cooks should be careful to clean sticky messes off the cooker instead of leaving it for the rest of us to do. (For anyone who read my post for Saturday and is thinking how quickly my mood has changed from one of positivity and good intentions - I actually wrote that post after I had been scrubbing for some hours on Sunday and just before this one.)
I had also gotten myself all worked up about Mr S going away at the weekend. Whilst working it all out on my knees in front of the cooker, I reminded myself of how often I swan off on my own, and decided that I was just being silly.
So the hours of scrubbing helped me work a few things out, as did finding the advent windows project. It is just what I need for December. The ebook asks us to reflect during the day with our word in mind, on four questions:
The first question is about self-care and how the word ushers this in. That's an easy one to answer, self-care means elimination of fearful thinking, resentment, and other unhealthy habits.
The second question is about how the word brings the fresh breeze of internal peace. I decided during the writing of yesterday's post, that now is the time to really move my attention away from lack and fear; and towards joy, the savouring of what I already have, and to gratitude.
The third question is about how the word gives me eyes and ears to celebrate a season of wonder: today I reflect on how I have learned to appreciate my home, with it's warmth and love, and also the order and chaos which arrives at our door in equal measure.
"The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak."
Hans Hofmann
Reverb12 prompt for today: What was your most significant purchase this year?
In September I helped my son buy thank you gifts for three of the people who had stood by him during the awful months from April to end of August, when he was dealing with a situation that in his words threatened to "swallow up his life".
These were my most significant purchases, it was important for me to thank them in this way. To mark their belief in him in some small way. Their belief in him and that of many others, kept us going when life seemed to be the darkest it has ever been. Their beautiful words about his character, and their friendships to him will be something for which I will always be immensely grateful.
Thank you to those lovely people for their presence in my son's life.
These were my most significant purchases, it was important for me to thank them in this way. To mark their belief in him in some small way. Their belief in him and that of many others, kept us going when life seemed to be the darkest it has ever been. Their beautiful words about his character, and their friendships to him will be something for which I will always be immensely grateful.
Thank you to those lovely people for their presence in my son's life.
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